Exclusive Interview w/ Ninety-Five Theses Author Martin Luther!

Through the strenuous efforts of Adam Robinson, Baltimore's poetic colossus in residence, we were able to get an exclusive interview with one of the most influential figures of the last five hundred years. In his first interview since the Diet of Worms, here is Martin Luther sharing about marriage, beer and vacation plans.
 
Mr. Luther, I have to ask, what does a man such as yourself do to relax?
Oh, my wife Katharina loves the movies (though she'd never admit it), so sometimes we'll head out in our DeLorean for a beer and a show. I have to say that, as I recall, Avatar was an unexpected pleasure. I enjoyed seeing the liberation of that oppressed community, especially since it was lead by a reformed member of the corrupt hegemony. I didn't see it in 3D though. That's a little ahead of my time.
 
Have you spoken to Erasmus of Rotterdam recently? If you were given a two week hiatus, would you take Erasmus of Rotterdam or Archbishop Albrecht of Mainz?

I would take Katharina! She's the only person who I haven't had a split with -- and who'd have thought that would be the case? I was never much for marriage, but Katharina is great and she doesn't let me get too carried away. In fact, she and I have a getaway vacation planned to Sandals Jamaica coming up. You don't want to be in Germany in January. 
 
In 2003 Joseph Fiennes played you in a movie. Did you find his performance realistic? In general, have impersonators made things awkward for you... socially?
My friend Lucas painted a better likeness of me -- sadly chubby -- but if people want to think of me as trim and fit like Fiennes, all the better, socially. And anyway I've never cared much for society types. Sometimes Katharina will have some students over and we'll eat and drink -- I make my own beer, you know -- and argue, I do love to argue. But that's an exciting night for me, socially

A recent batch of Mr. Robinson's work can be seen here.

Dylan L.
South Independence Branch